With time, we need to shed a lot of beliefs that we have held on for a long time, in order to grow mentally and emotionally. Emotional maturity comes in lots of ways – from the way we behave in a relationship to the way we react to others’ behavior. Learning to choose our battles also helps us in understanding how to deal with our emotional turmoil. Shedding light on this, Therapist Sadaf Siddiqi wrote, “Emotional growth comes in many forms. One of the strongest signs of maturity is the ability to let go of patterns that harm your ability to connect with others.”
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Addressing the importance of showing up in relationships, Sadaf further added, “Relationships are one of the most fulfilling experiences you can have as a human — how you show up in them matters just as much as how others show up for you.” The expert further shared a few beliefs that we need to let go for our own emotional growth:
Blaming others: If our first instinct is to blame others when something does not go right, we need to shed that habit. Understanding how things worked out and taking ownership of our own mistakes is a part of growth that we need to inculcate in our habits.
Soothing ego: in an argument, we often try to have the last word to soothe the ego and understand that we are right. However, not all arguments deserve our emotional energy, and we should learn to let go.
Control or change people: To soothe our own anxiety or our idea of a perfect life, we often try our best to change people or control them to behave the way we want. This will make us lose important people, as they will feel suffocated in our company. We need to loosen up and understand that we do not have everything in control, and that’s okay.
False narratives: We set our own timelines and our own false narratives about life. This creates immense burden on us. We need to learn to let go of such false narratives and accept life as it unfolds.
Meet other’s expectations: Often our entire life becomes a journey of meeting the needs and expectations of others. In the process we often lose ourselves and our own perspectives. We need to let go of that too.